|A local reporter was interviewing locals about the various uses of vaseline. He knocked on a door, and a man answered in his bathrobe.
"Sir, could you tell me what you use vaseline for?"
"Hmm...well, dry lips, dry skin, and, of course, sex."
"Well, me and the missus put a little vaseline on the doorknob..."
"And it keeps the kids out."
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