The Reason Why I Fired My Secretary
|Two weeks ago was my forty-fifth birthday, and I wasn't feeling too hot that morning anyway. I went to breakfast knowing my wife would be pleasant and say Happy Birthday, and probably have a present for me.
She didn't even say Good Morning, alone any Happy Birthday. I thought, Well, that's wives for you. Maybe the children will remember.
The children came in to breakfast and didn't say a word.
When I started to the office I was feeling pretty low and despondent. As I walked into my office, my secretary, Janet, said, Good morning boss, Happy Birthday. And I felt a little better; someone had remembered.
I worked until noon. Then Janet knocked on my door and said, You know, it's such a beautiful day outside and it's your birthday, let's go to lunch, just you and me. I said, By George, that's the best thing I've heard all day. Let's go.
We went to lunch. We didn't go where we normally go; we went out into the country to a little private place. We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously.
On the way back to the office, she said, You know, it's such a beautiful day. We don't need to go back to the office, do we? I said, No, I guess not. She said, Let's go to my apartment. After arriving at her apartment she said, Boss, if you don't mind, I think I'll go into the bedroom and slip into something more comfortable.
Sure, I excitedly replied. She went into the bedroom and, in about six minutes, she came out carrying a big birthday cake, followed by my wife, children and dozens of our friends. All were singing Happy Birthday and there on the couch I sat... naked.
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